Tuesday, July 10, 2007

Wednesday, July 04, 2007

Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Falwell's Future

Falwell's Future


Sponge Bob can now breath a sigh of relief

As Falwell's into a six foot hole.

Apparently God has issued a recall

To bring back defective souls.

What happened seventy three years ago

When Jerry's soul was manufactured?

Were the halls of Heaven too full;

Sending souls to Earth quite fractured?

His defective soul was full of anger;

Blaming Gays for God’s wrath.

Hurricanes and tornadoes wiped out those

Who just weren’t on God’s path.

But God’s receipt has also expired

For the angry one who thrived on debatin’,

There’s a place where defective souls may go.

Jerry will argue his new lease with Satan.

Friday, May 11, 2007

Blair Leaves the Lair

Blair Leaves the Lair
Mark Lysgaard

We talked last year
And made things clear
About the Bush Office of Managing Blair.
Now Blair will leave
And Bush will receive
A power vacuum with nothing to spare.

The Coalition of the Willing
Is quickly shrinking from the killing,
But looking for a new partner to share.
The gross neglect
Saw Blair defect
From Dubya’s paper tiger’s lair.

As Blair steps down
From scandals that abound,
Bush continues his paper tiger roar.
We should all heed well
That the path to Hell
Is paved by Yes men dressed as whores.

If Blair really was the labor leader
With policies found in no labor reader,
Who should be the next prime minister?
Calling all pagers
Where is John Majors?
Or someone who is somehow less sinister.

Thursday, May 10, 2007

Eleven Elephants & One Worried Weasel

Eleven Elephants & One Worried Weasel
Eleven Republicans meet with Bush to pressure him to add benchmarks to the occupation in Iraq
By Mark Lysgaard

Within the week the worried weasel
Wailed about weary war funds.
No timid timetables to take the terrorists
No benchmarks to breech and run.

But vitriolic voters vented
This nasty nightmare makes them nervous
The once grand Guard is going and gone…
As domestic disasters demand their service.

But eleven elephants earnestly asked
The war wimp weasel without wonk.
How high will the head count go?
Will eleven elephants lose their trunks?

Sunday, May 06, 2007

Dying to Make a Living

Dying to Make a Living
By Mark Lysgaard

The ad rang out from coast to coast
Televising the latest positions.
Don’t be nervous!
Join the arm service
For a dry drunk’s bad decisions.

The crest of the televised ads hit hard
In small towns and inner cities.
While the investor class
Saw their stocks rise fast
And the MIC* sitting safe and pretty.

Special effects of G.I. Joes in actions
From the Madison Avenue Ad firms.
Like a lure in the water
Hooking kids for slaughter
In an occupation we haven’t learned.

That’s one way to reduce the inner city poor
While Madison Avenue keeps on giving.
When our kids don’t return,
Are we surprised to learn
That they’re just dying to make a living?

*Military Industrial Complex

Friday, May 04, 2007

The Classified Class of Lies

The Classified Class of Lies
Sen. Dick Durban (D) IL. On the Senate Intelligence Committee as a minority member when the Republicans had control of the House. Durban had the epiphany to recently tell the American people that he was sworn to secrecy about the aluminum tubes as questionable to being used to make nuclear weapons, and the false information that was sold to the American people.
By Mark Lysgaard

In a class all by himself
Dick Durban had an epiphany.
The aluminum tubes
That lit the war fuse
Will forever live in infamy.

Durban was sworn as a minority member
To never reveal the facts.
Aluminum tubes
Another big ruse
To cover the Bush tracks.

Now Durban is being smeared by the pugs
For revealing what he should not have said.
He’s no longer silent
To hide the violence
Of lies that we the people were fed.

The fourth estate in their corporate trenches
Has decided to also remain quiet.
With so many scandals,
How do they handle
The truth that may lead to riots?

So how is it that We the People
Who elect others like us,
Would be taken
By the profit makin’
President of in war we trust?